


Butterflies in Your Palm

by markhyuckles



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Canon Universe, Donghyuck centred, Donghyuck likes marks hands, Everyone is mentioned at least once, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Johnny is so sweet, M/M, The guys tagged are just most prominent I guess, guys!! showing platonic affection!! without it being sexualised!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-23
Updated: 2019-03-23
Packaged: 2019-11-28 15:35:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18210209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/markhyuckles/pseuds/markhyuckles
Summary: “It’s about Mark!” He yelled, shocking both himself and Johnny who stumbled over his own feet.  He rushed over to the pan, flipping the stove switch off and sighing in relief when the bubbles began to calm down. Hyuck wondered where the switch to do that in his brain was.“Mark?” Johnny asked once he’d turned back around. Donghyuck nodded. “What about him?”- OR -Donghyuck really likes holding Mark's hand. It just takes him a while to realise why





	Butterflies in Your Palm

**Author's Note:**

> this is the product of me sobbing at like 3am in the morning thinking about how affectionate haechan is and about how much I want to hold marks hand so like, enjoy?? I guess??

Donghyuck liked affection.

He’d find it wherever he could. Hugging Johnny in the morning as soon as he saw him, clinging to his older bandmate like a koala and making him laugh. Ruffling Jisung and Chenle’s hair at practice, making them whine at him to stop. Wrestling playfully with Yangyang when he came around to the 127 dorm; it always ended with pair of them out of breath, Hyuck collapsed on top of him as Kun sighed from across the room. He’d play with Yuta’s hair occasionally too, the other completely nonchalant as he ate or did whatever he was doing, or he’d drag Taeil over to himself and smother him in cuddles. At night, when they were up late watching horror movies followed by rom-coms to forget about what they’d seen, he’d end up in a comfy pile with Jeno, Jaemin and Renjun. Eventually, Taeyong or Jaehyun would wake them up softly, dragging Hyuck with them to the dorms. They’d smile and roll their eyes as Hyuck pointed to his cheek once he’d got into bed, bending down and planting tiny kisses on his skin like he asked.

And then there was Mark.

“Hyuck, you there?” He heard someone ask, pulling him out of whatever he’d been thinking about. When he turned, he saw it was Mark himself. He looked at Hyuck, eyes pulled down into a narrow frown as he watched the younger who smiled and nodded.

“Yeah, sorry,” he said. “Was just… thinking.”

Mark nodded, not entirely convinced, and turned back to the conversation the others were having across the table. But not before Hyuck felt something, a barely there ghost of movement over his hand placed on his lap. When he looked down, he saw Mark’s own hand retreating back to the table like it had never been there.

The conversation continued. Everything continued like normal, Chenle arguing with Lucas about something half way across the table as Kun tried to settle them down. The others were laughing at the spectacle, even Mark, his voice high and giggly as he spoke. But Donghyuck’s heart was beating out of his chest, hard and fast like he’d just ran for his life in one of those horror movies he’d seen with Jeno and the others.

When everything else had settled down, Hyuck’s heart didn’t.

❀❀❀

After that night, Hyuck kept waiting. Waiting for it to happen again. He wanted to see if his heart did that thing again, pacing and skipping its beats like that.

Yeah, that’s why he wanted it to happen again.

A learning experience, sure.

They were practicing a new choreography, 127 packed into a stuffy practice room early in the morning. So, naturally, Donghyuck was tired. His mind was hazy as he moved though the steps on autopilot, the movement practically second nature to him now. Which was why it was so easy for himself to tell that he was messing up.

“Hyuck, you’re doing it wrong.”

He scoffed at Mark’s words, finally giving up and relaxing his shoulders as he turned to his friend.

“No shit, Sherlock,” he said. “I’m trying I just, can’t get my hands to co-ordinate with my feet. It’s too early.”

“Here, let me help,” he heard Mark say and the next minute, he was stood right next to Donghyuck, breath tickling his neck as he grabbed his arm.

He moved Hyuck’s arm, counting the beats under his breath as Donghyuck danced through the foot work. Occasionally, Mark would move his feet apart more or place his shoulders more to the front. But his hand never left Donghyuck’s arm.

“Your hand needs to come out like this,” Mark explained, demonstrating with his own outstretched arms. Hyuck attempted to copy him, the hairs on his arm standing up where Mark had just let go. Counting the beats in his head, he moved. But he could tell he was still doing it wrong.

Mark sighed gently, moving closer again. He placed his hand on Donghyuck’s arm, moving it slowly down. Mark left fire in his path until he finally reached Hyuck’s hand. His breathing seemed to stop.

Because there it was again. That warm, fuzzy ache in the centre of his chest that made his heart beat faster. It felt like it was bruising his ribs slowly, encircling his heart and squeezing down. But he didn’t want it to stop. He furrowed his eyebrows in concentration as Mark interlaced their fingers and moved their hands through the movement together.

Hyuck watched Mark as he spoke. He didn’t seem to be affected, he thought. Didn’t seem to be fighting a tickling ache in his chest as he pulled at Donghyuck’s hand. Didn’t seem like his body was heating up any more than the warm practice room made him already and didn’t seem like he was struggling to focus on anything but their hands clasped together.

So why was Donghyuck?

“You did it!” 

Hyuck jumped at the excitement in Mark’s voice. He looked down at his feet, perfectly in place. His shoulders facing centre in the mirror and his hands. His hands perfectly mimicking the position of his feet. His hand still intertwined with Mark’s.

He smiled breathlessly with triumph, giggling at himself in the mirror. Mark squeezed his hand one final time before letting go, clapping as he watched Donghyuck do the move again and again.

He never messed it up after that.

❀❀❀

It took him a while, but Hyuck decided that he knew what the issue was. In fact, he was positive as he walked up to Xiaojun and calmly placed his hand in his. Xiaojun looked down at their hands from where he’d simply been stood, confusion written across his face.

“Haechan?” He said, eyes still focused on the younger’s hand in his.

“Hmm?” Donghyuck said, smiling up at him innocently.

“Why are you holding my hand?”

“No reason.”

“Do you have something gross on your hand, again?” Xiaojun asked, still suspicious. Donghyuck gasped.

“No! I’m not pulling a prank, idiot,” he said. He squeezed Xiaojun’s hand tighter who squeaked in pain. Hyuck grit his teeth. “I’m just trying to figure something out.”

“Figure what out?” Xiaojun asked, trying to pry his hand out of Donghyuck’s. He had a very strong grip. Donghyuck sighed in frustration.

“Why isn’t it working?” He muttered in confusion, losing his grip. Xiaojun finally managed to pull himself away, massaging his palm.

“What’s not working?”

“Nothing,” he said, eyes focused on flittering between his own hand and Xiaojun’s painfully red one. He shrugged, muttering a quick goodbye to Xiaojun and leaving him alone again to watch after the boy.

“This band is so weird.”

He tried it again later that day with Doyoung. They were sat together on the sofa watching something that Hyuck hadn’t been paying attention to for the past half an hour when he slowly placed his hand on top of Doyoung’s. Surprisingly, his Hyung instantly reciprocated, turning his hand over and clasping his over Hyuck’s. He hummed.

They held hands for a while, Donghyuck tracing Doyoung’s knuckles absentmindedly as they carried on watching the show. At some point, Ten joined them, so Hyuck joined hands with him too. He laughed, looking at the younger with his hand in Doyoung’s and his own. He watched Hyuck carefully, watching the way he stared at their hands, like he was waiting for something.

He shook his head and carried on watching. He’d indulge the kid, for now, he thought.

After that, Donghyuck tried it with whoever he could. Saddling up to Jungwoo on the way to rehearsal and grabbing his hand. Skipping through the halls with Hendery and Lucas, attached to him on either side. Simply turning to Sicheng and saying ‘I’m going to hold your hand now’ before even giving him a second to process.

And it was nice, he concluded as he sat in bed that night. Holding hands with all of his band mates was nice. It comforted him and made him feel loved, like they always made him feel. But it wasn’t the same as with Mark. It didn’t make his tummy go all hazy and make his chest constrict.

So maybe, his hypothesis was incorrect, he concluded as he drifted off into sleep. He still felt the phantom feel of a hand placed firmly in his.

❀❀❀

“Hyuckie? Can I speak to you for a second?”

Donghyuck hummed at Johnny, turning the tap off and looking over at his Hyung. He’d asked Hyuck to help him make food for some of the others, evacuating everybody else from the kitchen so that it was just him and Donghyuck. He’d thought it weird at first, but soon forgot about it as Johnny gasped when he flicked water in his face.

Donghyuck moved over to Johnny, pan of water in hand and placed it on the stove. Johnny turned it on, leaning against the counter as they waited for it to boil. Hyuck was chopping cabbage when Johnny spoke up.

“So, how are you feeling?”

Donghyuck looked up at Johnny, eyes narrowed, before turning back to the cabbage. He shrugged.

“Perfectly fine, Hyung,” he said, looking back to Johnny. “How about you?”

Johnny choked on his spit, arms crossing over his chest as he mumbled that he was fine. Donghyuck pointed to the gochujang, and Johnny turned. Scooping some into the water, he turned back to Donghyuck who was still cutting up the cabbage.

“So there’s… nothing on your mind at the moment?” Johnny asked as he stirred the liquid. He leaned in closer to Donghyuck, watching him closely.  He tensed and laughed nervously.

 _Gotcha,_ Johnny thought.

“N-not really, Hyung.”

Johnny sighed. The spoon clattered softly as he put it down and Hyuck stopped cutting the cabbage. He refused to meet Johnny’s eyes as he made himself lower. He did that sometimes with Hyuck. And it usually meant things were about to get serious. That Johnny was about to try and give him advice.

“Look, I didn’t want to bring this up but,” he began. “Ten spoke to me about something.”

“Motherfucker- “

“Hey! Language,” Johnny screeched, stifling a laugh. He jumped up onto the counter opposite the stove, patting the space next to him for Hyuck to join him. Slowly, he trudged over and hoisted himself up next to Johnny who bumped his shoulder against his own.

“So?”

“So what?” Donghyuck retorted, looking down at the hands in his lap.

“You wanna hold my hands too?” Johnny laughed, holding them out in invitation. But Donghyuck simply winced, curling into himself even further. Johnny retracted his hands, face falling.

“Sorry, Hyuck I just wanted to lighten the mood,” he said. “You know I’m not good at this stuff.”

“I know. I still remember what happened when you and Taeil tried to give me and the others ‘the talk.’”

The pair laughed in embarrassment. The memory was still painfully etched in Donghyuck’s memory, Renjun and Jaemin’s screeches still prominent in his mind along with Taeil’s cherry red face.

They settled again, the awkward silence replaced with their usual comforting quiet.

“Look, Ten noticed it. That you were being extra affectionate to people,” Johnny began. “Even Xiaojun noticed, I heard him talking to Lucas about it.”

“I’m sorry,” Donghyuck muttered.

“Hey, hey no.” Johnny placed his hand on Hyuck’s shoulder, the younger looking up with glassy eyes at his Hyung. “Don’t be sorry, no one’s mad. We’re worried. I thought something might have happened?” He said it as a question. An invitation.

Donghyuck took it.

“No, I’m just trying to figure something out.”

“That’s what Xiaojun told me,” Johnny began, ignoring Donghyuck’s scoff. Of course Xiaojun had blabbed. “What are you trying to figure out?”

Mouth open, Hyuck was ready to pour it all out. To over spill his thoughts and feelings, the jumble of puzzling scenarios fumbling to fit together in his head. But he stopped, snapping his mouth shut again.

“Hyuckie?”

“I’m sorry, Hyung I don’t think I – “

“It’s okay, Donghyuck.” Johnny jumped down from the counter. “You don’t have to tell me. Not now, not tomorrow, not ever if you don’t want to. But you can. If you want.”

Clasping a hand on Donghyuck’s shoulder, Johnny smiled. He turned, moving back over to finish chopping up the cabbage and rice cakes. And it was like in that very moment, along with the pot of bubbling Tteokbokki sauce, that Donghyuck’s mind decided to spill over.

“It’s about Mark!” He yelled, shocking both himself and Johnny who stumbled over his own feet.  He rushed over to the pan, flipping the stove switch off and sighing in relief when the bubbles began to calm down. Hyuck wondered where the switch to do that in his brain was.

“Mark?” Johnny asked once he’d turned back around. Donghyuck nodded. “What about him?”

“I noticed it a couple of days ago,” Hyuck began, twiddling with his fingers as he spoke. He didn’t want to look Johnny in the eyes. “Mark, he just. He touched my hand, that’s all he did but…”

“But?”

“But it made me feel weird. And then it happened again at practice. I thought that maybe it was because I just liked holding people’s hands so- “

“So, you’ve been holding everyone’s hands,” Johnny asked, voice laced with something Hyuck pretended wasn’t amusement. “I’m guessing it didn’t feel the same?”

“Not even a bit!” He jumped down from the counter, pacing the kitchen.

“Oh boy, I am not cut out for this,” Johnny muttered, rubbing his face in exhaustion. Carefully, he watched Donghyuck for a while. The way he fiddled with his hands as he paced, knees wobbly and ears red.

“Okay uhm.” He stood up, deciding to join Hyuck in his pacing. Maybe it’d help calm him down too, he thought. “I know this is a lot to take in but, have you considered the possibility that – “

“Don’t say it.”

“What?”

“I know what you’re going to say, Hyung.” And when he looked up, eyes wide and shaky, Johnny felt his heart clench.

“Okay well, if you know then.” He made sure Donghyuck was looking him straight in the eyes as he spoke. “You should also know that it’s fine. That you liking boys, liking Mark, isn’t a bad thing.”

Donghyuck nodded, hands reaching out for his Hyung’s who took them gently.

“I know it’s just… Weird?” He said. He couldn’t find the right words. He didn’t think he ever could, really.

“And that’s okay too,” Johnny said. “It’s okay to be confused and unsure. Hell knows I was.”

Donghyuck’s eyes shot up from where they’d been focused on their hands. They were bleary and wide.

“You?”

“Yeah.” He smiled. “Guys and women. Which is also okay, by the way. Liking both. Not that you have to have that figured out right now, or ever but.”

“Okay,” Donghyuck giggled, cutting Johnny off. It was breathless, but nowhere near as much as Mark made him.

Letting go off each other’s hands, they turned to face the stove. The Tteokbokki had turned cold in the pan, the cabbage and rice cake left abandoned at the side. They turned to face each other.

“Takeout?”

“Takeout.”

❀❀❀

It took a while, but Donghyuck learned how to comfortably exist around Mark again. They’d laugh and smile, Hyuck pretending his stomach didn’t flip and his heart didn’t sore every time Mark giggled.

They were in a small, closed off restaurant, celebrating 127’s recent win when it happened.

Donghyuck had been sat there, perfectly contempt with listening to Mark tell their Hyungs ridiculous stories while the others laughed along. They’d been there for a while, Donghyuck’s eyes beginning to slowly droop with every breath he took.

His hand came up from under the table, resting his cheek gently in his palm. And as he began to drift off, he felt it. A warmth travelling to his hand still underneath the table. It reached his thigh, tickling his skin before finally reaching his hand. When it did, he felt his heart pick up its pace and suddenly he was wide awake again. Because it was like his heart knew exactly what it was.

Could never forget the comforting warmth of Mark Lee’s hand wrapped with his.

His eyes snapped open, sitting himself perfectly upright and staring down at their hands. How perfectly they fit together, like the final puzzle piece missing in his brains thoughts.

Mark snatched the hand back with a start.

“I’m sorry, I thought you were asleep so I just,” he stuttered, cheeks flushing red. Donghyuck giggled. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

Mark nodded, turning back to the conversation. Donghyuck’s shoulders slumped and he pretended he couldn’t feel Johnny’s eyes burning into him from halfway down the table.

Once they’d finished eating and the Hyungs had drank as much as they could without risking a hangover the next day, they all trekked out into the cars waiting for them. Donghyuck moved to open one of the car doors, before he felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Me, Mark and Donghyuck will take this one,” Johnny said, looking at him. “Jungwoo and Taeil too.”   

Jungwoo perked up from his phone, looking at Johnny, then Hyuck and finally Taeil. They both shrugged.

“Cool.”

“Fine by me.”

“Yeah,” Mark muttered. “Let’s go.”

Johnny shuffled them all into the car, ushering Mark and Donghyuck in first. They squeezed themselves into the very back, not even bothering to pull down the other seats, scrambling over the squeaky leather instead. Sighing, Donghyuck lay back into his seat. He pretended not to notice Mark sitting as far away from him as possible.

They were about five minutes into the journey home when Donghyuck’s phone went off.

He pulled it out of his back pocket, artificial light beaming on his face and making his eyes squint in pain.

**Messages:**

**_Johnny-Hyung  (´_** ** _꒳ `_** ** _✿):_** Talk to him   **19:17**

 ** _Johnny-Hyung  (´_** ** _꒳ `_** ** _✿):_** Now     **19:17**

He fumbled, locking his phone and turning to look out of the window. But not before Johnny caught his eye in the mirror, pointed look aimed directly at Donghyuck. He ignored Jungwoo and Taeil in the middle, giggling at something on Jungwoo’s phone, staring directly over them to Donghyuck who shrunk into himself.

He whined, turning to face Mark. If he’d turned any quicker, maybe he would have noticed Mark struggling to put his own phone away. Instead, all he saw was the wide eyes he threw to the front of the car and all he heard was Johnny scoffing.

There was about ten seconds of silence until.

“I’m sorry.”

“Can we talk?”

They both laughed, the air still tense with a mixture of anxiety and exhaustion.

“You can go first,” Donghyuck whispered, gesturing to Mark.

“Right so,” he began. “I’m sorry.”

“Why?”

“For holding your hand.”

Donghyuck froze. He looked at Mark who looked at him. That’s all they did for a while, ignoring the burning stare they could feel in the sides of their heads that was absolutely Johnny.

“You’re sorry,” Donghyuck said, slowly. He tried wrapping his brain around what he’d heard. “For holding my hand?”

Mark nodded.

“Why?”

“Because, I did it without thinking. I just wanted to hold your hand and I didn’t think to acknowledge that maybe you didn’t want me doing that until you looked at me. I made you uncomfortable.”

Donghyuck laughed. He couldn’t help it, he thought, giggling to himself uncontrollably as Mark rubbed at his arms and looked anywhere but at the smiling boy in front of him.

“Mark Lee you really are a fucking idiot.” He continued to giggle a little, Mark rolling his eyes.

“Gee thanks,” he muttered.

“I’m not uncomfortable with you holding my hand, dumbass.” His voice was soft, gentle and comforting when he spoke. Mark’s eyes shot up, looking at Donghyuck who fumbled with his hands playing at the hem of his shirt.

“You’re not?” Mark asked. “But I thought – “

“I looked at you funny because I was surprised. You don’t… Do that stuff normally because I thought it made _you_ uncomfortable. So, I wasn’t upset about it, Mark. Just pleasantly surprised.”

“Oh. So, I can hold your hand?” Mark ventured. Donghyuck nodded, the blush rising in his cheeks difficult to quell.

For a while, Mark seemed to be deep in thought. Until he quietly shuffled closer to Hyuck. And once again Donghyuck watched as Mark’s hand reached for his own. Watched as he joined their pinkies together first and felt his own breath get caught in his throat.

“So, you like holding my hand, huh?” Donghyuck eventually managed to choke out past the butterfly that had travelled to his throat.

Mark mumbled a quiet shut up as he laughed.

“It’s okay,” Hyuck whispered. He pulled the rest of Mark’s hand into his with a squeeze. “I do too.”  

The rest of the car ride was spent with Donghyuck’s head resting on Mark’s shoulder, Johnny watching them silently, Jungwoo and Taeil occasionally yelling at each other. And two intertwined hands that were connected to two hearts.

❀❀❀

After that night, something changed.

Hand holding became their thing. If Mark and Donghyuck were together, they were probably holding hands. Yuta even asked Mark if their hands had been glued together by one of the Dreamies, but he just shook his head, gripping Donghyuck’s hand tighter.

So, that was their thing. But apparently, so was the subtle flirting.

And it was _Mark_ that started it.

They’d been sat with a few of the others watching a drama (holding hands, of course) when Hyuck suddenly felt a ghost of movement against his jaw. Before he knew it, he was staring directly at Mark who had pulled his face towards him. He stayed completely still, scared to move.

“You had an eyelash on your face,” Mark said as he blew it away. Donghyuck nodded, numb.

Mark hummed, tilting his head.

“What?”

“You have pretty eyes.” He’d said before turning back to the TV, leaving Donghyuck shaky and dazed.

Yeah, that was a thing.

And that’s how Donghyuck found himself practically lying across Mark’s chest in his room, mumbling the lyrics to the song playing quietly in the back as Mark ran his hand through his hair. They’d been sat there for a while, in varying degrees of comfortableness until they found a position that they both seemed to be okay with. They didn’t speak unless it was Mark mumbling for Donghyuck to move slightly.

They still managed to hold hands somehow.

“Donghyuck?” Mark mumbled, pulling Donghyuck up into a sitting position and following suit. Frowning, Donghyuck watched Mark patiently, waiting for whatever he was going to say.

“You okay?” He asked.

“I’m fine just…” Mark faltered, stumbling over his own words. “You like holding my hand, right?”

Donghyuck frowned.

“Well duh. I don’t think we would have been doing it for so long if I didn’t right?” He lifted their still joined hands up in the air.

And just like that night in the car, with the moon in his eyes, Mark got lost in thought for a while.

“Okay well, what if I said I wanted to do something else?” He asked.

“What did you have in mind?” Donghyuck pondered, smiling at Mark.

Of all the things he expected Mark to say, what he actually said was something Donghyuck had only entertained during sleepless nights. When his mind was bleary, and his thoughts were blurred. When there was only one repeating factor of his dreams.

“I really want to kiss you.”

_Mark._

“Really?” Donghyuck didn’t even feel himself speak, merely hearing it flow from his mouth in a hushed whisper against the pale night.

When Mark nodded, ever so slightly, the shadows of light fluttered against his skin. And when the hand not holding Donghyuck’s reached up to cup his cheek, Donghyuck sighed into the softness and felt himself move ever so closer.

And when their lips finally met, Donghyuck felt numb.

His mind hit a short circuit, sparking momentarily before shutting off and making sure the only thing he noticed was the gentle glide of Mark’s lips against his own. It was comforting, warm and sweet. Just like Mark.

It only lasted a moment before they both pulled away, glancing at each other under hooded eyelids and shy smiles. Mark squeezed Donghyuck’s hand.

Donghyuck decided nothing would ever feel as soft as Mark Lee’s hand in his.

**Author's Note:**

> this was really fluffy I know but I'm a very affectionate person like hyuckie. I just wanna be best friends with mark lee man :((
> 
> also uhm long haired johnny antis don't interact. he looks like the lesbian skater gf I dream of having :((
> 
> kudos / comments are really appreciated ty ty uwu muah


End file.
